If you want friends you have to go out and make some, not collect them like
stamps on Facebook. Here’s a solid strategy to meet new people in real
time.
First and foremost, it’s about you, not them. Keep the focus on you, not
other people. The aim of going out shouldn’t be to meet someone. It should
be to do what you like to do. Get involved in things that are important to
you. The question isn’t, ''where’s everyone hanging out tonight besides
Starbucks?'' Instead, ask yourself, '”what do I like to do?'' -- and then
get out and do it. The rationale is that by getting out and doing what you
love, you’ll meet like-minded people who are out doing the same thing. It’s
like bumping into people at the crossroads of life. It’s these
“intersections,” or common interests, that are great starting points for
friendships. Talk to people. Say, “hi.” Introduce yourself. Have actual
conversations instead of texting. .
New friends may also have friends of their own. So a new friend may invite
you to a party where you can meet even more people. A sort of ripple effect
happens.
You’ll also be happy, engaged, and confident in your own skin by
participating in activities you’re passionate about. These positive vibes
will make you magnetic, attracting more people to you.
Even if you don’t make a friend, you’ll be living your own life, running
your own race, and spending time doing what you like to do, not sitting home
on the couch with your face in a carton of ice cream.
In summary, if you like to cook, take a cooking class -- with real live
people (not online). If you love to hike, get walking on a popular trail. If
you enjoy exercise, join a health club, bike club, or runners club. If you
read, go to the library (Yes, they still exist.). If your thing is
meditation, join a spiritual center. You get the idea... One last thought.
Try to stay open. Friends are just that -- friends. Friendship is about
quality of character – what’s inside – will this person “show up” for me in
life? It’s not about whether or not they have the trendiest hairstyle.
Are you still reading this? What are you waiting for? Go out and make some
new friends!